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Archive for the ‘Sound and Fury’ Category

My story would begin in darkness though not total darkness but not romantic moonlit darkness either.   It would be more the darkness that accompanies a storm.   The kind that diffuses the the light and casts strange shadows across the land.  The kind that causes the street lamps to come on at mid-day.
I stand at the gate looking out at the road that lies before me, uncertain which direction to go from here.  Do I open the gate and step through?   Or do I run back  to the porch and ride out the storm in the relative comfort of  the crumbling structure I am  seeking to escape?   Do I stay until the bitter end?
I stand at the gate and look back.  Indecision has me paralyzed and the storm is increasing in intensity.   I feel the  wind at my back and it causes me to shiver.  I adjust my collar and huddle down to make myself a smaller target for the chill breeze and once again turn to look at the road before me just a step beyond the gate.
I stand at the gate and my eyes search for any sign of direction.   Off in the distance I see rays of sunlight that quickly retreat into shadow as I watch, teasing me with hope that is transient and elusive.    I’m too old to go chasing after “maybes” and “what-ifs.”  I need a sure thing.  Yet I realize how unreasonable and unrealistic that standard is.  There are no “sure things” and to make that a requirement will only keep me paralyzed with indecision.
I stand at the gate…

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“Don’t have that ‘extra’ fiber the evening before, or the day of your Yoga Class.”

“Down Dog” will bark.

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Ok, if your sensibilities are easily offended, if you can’t handle too much information, then move along. This will be your only warning!

You have been warned!

There is something about the ceramic tiles in a shower area that give a special resonance to sound in there. Now, couple that with a warped sense of humor and the results are … well, here’s what happened:

Tonight after my workout at the “Y” I did my usual 10-12 minutes in the steam room just to iron out the wrinkles. Along with those wrinkles there has been an increase in watching my diet, which helps with the over-all reason I am working out at the “Y” and that is to lose weight and get in shape. I have been watching my calorie intake and trying to eat healthy: Fruits, grains, fiber, nuts, proteins and cutting back on the carbs. You’ll notice I mentioned “fiber.” Maybe I had a little extra fiber today which would account for what happened.

After the steam room it’s part of my routine to take a shower. So I shuffle into the shower stall and get started. Everything is going well until I drop my shampoo bottle. As I bend over to retrieve the shampoo… there is a rumbling, a disturbance in the force, which erupts with the sound of a thousand throaty Harley-Davidsons. The resonance effect in the shower area acts as an echo chamber, which serves to amplify the event. It went on for what seemed to be several minutes. When the last roll of thunder finally died away the room became silent.

I listened.

And I waited…

only to realize,

I…

was…

a-lone.

Standing there with the water running over me and shampoo slowly making its way over my wrinkled brow to pour into my eyes, the thought popped in my head, “All that …for nothing.” I was disappointed that no one was there to share such an Epic event with. No snickers, no guffaws, not even an O-M-g. Then it came to me in a flash. A grin began to form at the corner of my mouth and quickly spread over my face as I said to myself,

Merlin’s Beard! As I live and breathe, it’s Hairy Pharter!”

Sometimes I crack myself up! Bwahahahahahahaahahahahaha!

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Propaganda

Be it religious or political I thought that this would be a good time to remember what Propaganda is and how it is delivered so that we don’t succumb to it either at the polls or in the pews.

Assertion:

Assertion is commonly used in advertising and modern propaganda. An assertion is an enthusiastic or energetic statement presented as a fact, although it is not necessarily true. They often imply that the statement requires no explanation or back up, but that it should merely be accepted without question. Examples of assertion, although somewhat scarce in wartime propaganda, can be found often in modern advertising propaganda. Any time an advertiser states that their product is the best without providing evidence for this, they are using an assertion. The subject, ideally, should simply agree to the statement without searching for additional information or reasoning. Assertions, although usually simple to spot, are often dangerous forms of propaganda because they often include falsehoods or lies.

Find more here : http://library.thinkquest.org/C0111500/proptech.htm

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If you believe this statement, “your pastor is more important than you are,” then you might be a cult member.

If you believe,the most important thing that goes on in church is preaching,” then you might be a cult member.

If you, “Teach your child that there is nothing more important in the world than a church service.” then you might be a cult member.

If you believe in order to please God : “You should also have a level of dress that is above your everyday fare. If you just said, “I don’t dress up for anybody”you have a serious pride problem. You think you’re too wonderful to have to humble yourself and admit that there could actually be someone in existence that is above you socially. There is! His name is “the LORD.” You should “put on your best” to go to church. 

And:

Men: wear a dress shirt and tie. That’s right, a tie, even if it’s just a clip-on. God is more important than you! Dress up for Him.

And:

Ladies: I don’t care if you think you have to dress like “Rosie-the-Riveter” during the week just to show how liberated you are, wear a dress to church. Why? Because even the God-hating world knows that a woman wears a dress when she dresses up.…

Then you might be a cult member.

If you believe this statement to be true: “The truth is that you just don’t think God is important enough to spend money on clothes for Him. But when your child is sick you’ll run right to Him and almost demand He jump up and fix him up. You’re special. God isn’t.Then you might be a cult member. 

 

Two words:  BULL GIPP

Folks take note “This is the very definition of a Fundamental Evangelist.” This is a successful evangelist because his agenda is to set the people straight on “How to behave in Church” and he exalts the so-called M-O-g to just one step shy of god-hood. This is what those so called “Pastors” want to hear preached to their people by the visiting Evangelist.

Bull Gipp knows how to manipulate the mere sheep in the pews so that they properly reverence their local deity. This cult activity is is built on the premise, “How can you worship god correctly if you don’t worship the man-o-gawd correctly?”  Notice the works sanctification that he preaches.  Notice the heritical, you have to be right with God in order for Him to Love you and Bless you.  It’s not who we are “in Christ” but what we do “for Christ” that justifies and sanctifies us according to Bull Gipp.

This is a perfect example of “Elmer Gantry-ism.”

And the sheeple have been so numbed by such poison as this, that they take it in and count themselves blessed to be in the presence of such annointed preaching and called™ men-o-gawd.  And all the mere pew dwellers said? …  B-U-L-L-L GIPP!

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